Jericho, Tuckers 05, A Time For Tears
by JT-of-JFF
Summary: From JerichoFanFiction; An addendum to the Winter's end episode. This is a side story that I hope has a lot of power to it.


**SUMMARY: An addendum to the Winter's end episode. This is a side story that I hope has a lot of power to it.**

**WARNINGS: PROFANITY, VIOLENCE, ADULT SITUATIONS, STRONG EMOTIONAL CONTENT**

AUTHOR'S NOTE: As a favor to the author, please read this in one sitting. It is longer than my other chapters, but I've split this off because the story took on a life of its own. I am not condoning the actions of John Tucker as a character… merely trying to tell a story in its entirety. I have stripped as much of the how-to detail as possible. It doesn't have a place in this story. While this story has religious references, please do no take this as anything more than a portrayal of the character.

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DISCLAIMER: The name "Jericho" and all character names and trademarks associated with the television program are the intellectual property of Junction Entertainment, Fixed Mark Productions, CBS Paramount Television and/or CBS Studios, Inc. The following stories are works of fan fiction intended solely as an intellectual exercise without profit motive. No infringement of copyright is intended or should be implied.  
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TITLE: Tuckers-A Time for Tears- Chapter 1 of 1  
AKA: (1-16)Winter's End**

STORY TYPE: Complements Episodes with Alternate Characters  
TIMELINE: 200X1206 (Bombs+66)  
EPISODE GUIDE: (1-16)Winter's End  
TUCKERS GUIDE: after A Time For All Good Men And Women  
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John Tucker walked the gravel path like everything is the world was perfect. At that moment… in his world… it was. It was a bright and sunny morning. The air was crisp and clean. His wife held his left hand. With his right, he pushed a jogging stroller with his son Sammy. In front of him walked his near twins Andrew and Emma carrying fishing poles and small backpacks.

He knew not far from here people thought it was the end of the world. That everything that mattered was gone. No internet. No cars. No TV. When it came down to it, John could not have cared less about those things. He had his faith, his family and his life. He devoted his soul to those things in that order.

He had married Beth more than fourteen years ago. To this day, whenever they walked together, he could feel her fingers around his wedding band. She always held his left hand for that reason. She would caress the band made of platinum and gold. It reassured her to feel it there. To know that it never left his hand.

They never should have been together, but they had always made it work. Their families, backgrounds and religion were all at polar opposites. Beth didn't want to date John. She had too many other things on her mind. Her parents already had a plan for her and it didn't include John. When she realized she actually was dating him she tried to break up with him. Over the next two years, she would try three more times. The disparity came to a head, when at the wedding, her parents' chairs were empty.

John liked to fast forward fourteen years past those empty chairs and look out over the family in front of him. Their family. When Andrew was born, the bills weren't paid off and they had barely moved into their first house, but Beth's biological clock had been ticking. Emma was officially an accident, conceived almost immediately after Andrew was born. With only two arms apiece, the still new parents waited a few more years before Sammy came along.

John Tucker was a big believer in penance and redemption. Growing up he had done lots of things that kids did and that went on a little bit of everywhere. The difference was that his had hurt people. Even if God forgave him, John would never forgive himself. He spent his life offering penance for his sins. His family had always been the conduit to his personal redemption.

If he had earned his marriage to Beth… and she did make him earn it, Andrew was the first pure gift from God. John had always knew his path lay in being a husband, so marriage wasn't the stunning change it was for most people.

Fatherhood, however, flooded him with joys and emotions he never knew were possible. It was the little things he did. The little expressions that he had. John had said many times, that if you need proof there is a God, just look into the eyes of a newborn and hold their fingers and toes.

When Emma came along it felt like the family he had long wanted was finally there. He had his wife, his boy and his girl. He lived his life through them… for them. Some people were called to be firemen or astronauts… doctors or priests. John Tucker was called to be a husband and father. Everything else was just the building blocks of that life for him.

As a family, they walked along the gravel road leading down to the river. The last few days had been an emotional and physical roller coaster. John had decided he wanted to take the morning off. After last night's realization that the family was about to grow larger, he really just wanted to get out and celebrate his family. The family was about to grow by one.

With everything going on, Beth hadn't realized she missed her period. She wrote off the extra tiredness to all the work they were doing and the weird hours. She never realized how short she was being with everyone. As John thought about it, he realized the deciding point for him had been when Beth decked Deputy Erickson and went after Mayor Gray. He told her last night that she was pregnant.

Just like when he told her about Andrew, she started off be refusing to believe it. She was really going to be peeved with him this afternoon when April confirmed it. The plan was to relax this morning, then go to the med center this afternoon.

John prayed to God, 'Thank you for all that you have given me. As I travel this life, please let me perform every task as if it was for you. Let me love everyone as if they were you. Please forgive my sins and guide me on this path. Thank you for the added joy you have given me. I do not deserve another child, but know in my heart, that this is what you want of me. Please accept that I raise this family for you and will give my life for it as you have given yours for me. In your name I pray… Amen.'

Beth Tucker always knew when her husband was talking to God. He would always squint his eyes and bow his head. It was his catholic upbringing. She would always wait until he was done, but right now it was killing her. She had been holding this since breakfast and was about to burst. Finally, he opened his eyes all the way and raised his head. "I am not pregnant. Don't think I don't see you over there making some deal with God. No number of rosaries are going to get me pregnant. I've been on birth control since Sammy."

"If you say so."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"What have you been using since your last prescription ran out?"

"April gave me a new prescription."

"And does it work exactly like the old one?"

"No but it should have been fine."

"Should have. But if it was different and had to build in your system first… well… April will settle it for us this afternoon."

Beth stopped vocalizing her objections, but John could still see her muttering under her breath. He just let it go. He was having too good a morning.

Andrew was walking out on point ten yards in front of his parents. "Dad. There's smoke coming out of the chimney!'

Beth let go of John's hand. Out of the corner of his eye, he could see her start to swing around her carbine. "Its OK. I came out during chores and started the fireplace. You know your mother won't stand out here in the cold with us."

Beth relaxed and let the rifle fall back down on its sling then looked up at her husband. "Not with you and your freakish blood. I have no idea how you stand this cold." She then turned to Andrew and Emma. "I'll start some hot chocolate for you. Just come on in when you're ready." She walked up to the front door of the cabin and pulled Sammy from the stroller. "You kids be safe. That water is cold. If you get wet you come straight inside."

"Yes Ma'm."

The children were already running out onto the boardwalks that ran along the riverfront and it wasn't long before the three of them all had lines in the water. It became a contest as they all used different rods and different flys. Andrew had his favorite spot at the mouth of the diversion stream. Emma went to the other end of the boardwalk to work her favorite rock. John would use his longer reach to work the middle of the stream.

Andrew was the first to catch a fish but it was Emma's, a little while later, that won the prize. "Dad! I've got one."

"So reel it in."

"I can't! It taking all the line."

John rushed down to where his daughter was.

"Here dad. Take it."

"Hold on. You can do this."

"Its too big. He's pulled the rod down."

"You can do this. Get the tip up again and slow the line. See he hasn't taken much line. Andrew get your mother."

"OK, now you've got him stopped. He's out there, but you can get him. Its just going to take some patience. Now walk up the boardwalk and pull him with you. He only weighs a few pounds. You're much larger than he is."

"Well its like wrestling Andrew."

Just then Andrew walks up with his mother in tow, "So he's gonna beat you!" Emma turns to look as he sticks out his tongue.

"You are so going down when I'm done with this stupid fish." The rod jerks a little and she concentrates on the rod again. A moment later she fires a shot "I'm gonna drop you like mom dropped bill."

Beth Tuckers faced turned beet red. "Kids… stop that right now. Emma… you're doing great." She catches the John's look out of the corner of her eye and she feels busted.

John didn't have to say it, but the situation was unusually flipped in his favor. "Just remember. These two have an amazing ability to take up after us... exactly what we do."

Beth ignored him and tried to get everyone to concentrate on catching the trout. "Emma. Pull and reel. Pull and reel. Andrew. Go get the net for your sister. John. Get ready to help her."

A few minutes later the fish is on the deck. Sammy walked up to poke at it, while the near twins were back at their rods. This time Beth was watching over them. John took the moment to settle back onto a bench. Andrew boasted how he would catch an even bigger one. Emma reminded him that he still needed a good beat down. Beth walked the boardwalk with her sunglasses up and her headband down. Everybody's cheeks were red with the cold.

This was just what he needed. While he knows they love to come down here, this really was not for the kids. This was for him. He could not care less if they caught any fish. He just wanted to watch them. He wanted to breathe in his family and find the strength to start another day. An hour later he rounded them all up and headed back to the house.

After dropping the kids with the sitter, John and Beth Tucker drove around the west side of town and headed straight to the hospital. The conversation was a little spirited. "There is no use wasting a pregnancy test on me. She should be looking at your chest."

"And she will. She can take care of your fears concerning my imminent demise from a bruise and reinforce my joy at our new Tucker."

As they drove up into the parking lot, they could see Jake arguing with Kenchy. He wasn't sure what they were arguing about but it was heated.

"You have to go back in there!"

"There's no use. She's going to die. I can't do this anymore."

John walked up beside them. "What's going on?"

"Its April."

John turned to Beth but she was already running into the hospital. Turning back to Jake. "What's the actual problem?"

"She's miscarrying. Kenchy is doing his best, but there's no power and she's lost a lot of blood."

Kenchy added, "Its really a lost cause Mr. Tucker."

"Why is there no power?"

"They're out of fuel?"

"What?! There was …What do you need?" This time John was looking at Kenchy.

"I need everything. Light and clean instruments would be a start, but its too late."

John walked straight to the back of the truck. He reached in and pulled out two five gallon cans of diesel. Pushing them at Jake, he ordered him; "Get the lights back on. There's two more cans when you've put those in. If you need more go to farm and get it."

John then turned and went into a drawer that ran the length of the truck bed. He pulled it all the way out. From the front of the drawer, he pulled an emergency first aid kit. "This is a major wound kit for gunshots." Then he went to the back of the drawer and pulled out a large olive green duffle bag. "This is a military aid kit. It should have instruments, sponges and sutures.

Kenchy started to say something, but John wasn't listening. "Take this and get back to work. Then tell me what you need."

"Its already too late."

"**GET BACK IN THERE NOW!** You have life to save!"

John was already running on autopilot. In the last minute, he realized that the future of his family tied to the future of Eric Green's family. April had delivered Sammy. She was Beth's doctor for everything. No only did they need April alive as a doctor, but the last thing Beth needed was to loose her pregnant friend. Not like this and not right now. They came here to start life, not watch it end.

John followed Kenchy into the hospital carrying the larger of the two bags. He walked past the Green family and into the prep room. Kenchy started washing up and putting on new gloves from the first aid kit. John rolled out the aid bag and started pulling the packaged instruments out of it. "Have the nurses un package these for you but here are antiseptics, coagulants, sponges, gauze." He turned to the doctor, "I'm sorry if I'm being too commanding. I don't believe in giving up. I just want you to say… when this is all over… that we did everything we could. Everything. Maybe there's new hope somewhere in this stuff."

Kenchy responded, "Mr. Tucker." Once he had his attention, he pulled a crucifix from around his neck and handed it to John. "This hasn't seemed to do me much good lately. Perhaps you can put it to better use now. I'll do everything I can, but we're going to lose her." John nodded to him. Kenchy made an obvious effort to put a smile on his face. He turned from the prep room, raised his arms and walked into the operating room. "Alright, let's see if we can get this bleeding stopped. Gail, Mr. Tucker brought us some new supplies. He can show you where they are. Please bring in the coagulants and anything we're short of here."

As John walked into the waiting room, the lights came on. Everyone looked up at the ceiling for a moment except John. He had his head down and held Kenchy's crucifix in his hand. He walked up to his wife who was waiting with the Greens. He put his left hand around her and held the crucifix in his right. He was interrupted for only a moment as his wife began to run her fingers over his wedding band.

A few minutes later John looked up and met the eyes in the room. Everyone had a grim expression on there face, but Johnston had a questioning look. "I gave Jake some fuel to put in the generator. It will last for a few hours, but I can get them more. The medical stuff we picked up on salvage ops. Any of it is your for the asking."

Guilt filled his face as he dropped his eyes and added; "If we had known, we'd have been here sooner."

Johnston answered. "This all happened so fast. None of knew it was happening. Jake came for me a few hours ago and Eric just showed up minutes before you."

John shot a questioning look, but Johnston just slumped his shoulders in response.

In time, the operation completed and April moved to a recovery room. Everyone moved their vigil into the hallway near her room. Someone turned off the generator and lit candles in the rooms and halls.

John Tucker was holding his wife in his arms when April died. He kept hold of her left hand and gently massaged her wedding band. As they closed April's eyes, he held Beth a little closer, not wanting to ever let go.

Eric stayed in April's room a few more minutes but then walked out into the hallway. As John saw him, he realizes that the prayers could not keep the questions in his head at bay or the anger in his heart. "Eric. Where were you today?"

"I was out getting firewood."

"All day?"

"Yeah."

The anger built in John. He clenched his fists and his arms grew bold. His neck became stiff. **"So while your family was dying today. You were off with HER. When they needed YOU…"**

John jabbed him in the chest. "…YOU were off with your mistress PISSING ON YOUR MARRIAGE!"

Eric tried to say something but a strangely intense John interrupted him. "Where's the fuel I gave you for the Med Center?"

"What fuel?"

John Tucker was enraged beyond anything Beth had ever seen. No one dared get in his path and Eric was looking for any way out. **"I gave you two drums of fuel last week. You said you needed it for the med center, but it wasn't here today. Where is it?"**

"They had enough here, so the town rationed it out…"

John couldn't take the excuses anymore. He had known the answers before he asked the questions but… to hear the excuses! It was more than he could take.

Eric never expected the right-hand roundhouse that caught the side of his face. He should seen it but John's clenched fist was a blur. Eric's jaw rocked and his eyes half way closed. Blood flew from a busted lip. He slumped against the wall.

John didn't hit him again, instead unleashing a pent up fury upon him. **"So while your wife and child died in the darkness. The fuel to save their lives was running your girlfriend's bar?" **

John bent over and bellowed in his face. **"While your family was dying you were off fucking her in the woods. Is that about it!?"**

Eric slumped to a sitting position. Broken and bleeding… he just sat there. He looked up at his parents, but they didn't move to stop it. John wanted to hit him again but Eric refused to fight back. Even the excuses had transformed into sobs.

John stood over him with his right hand bleeding. The crucifix impaled in his palm during the punch. "From the day you were born you had to fight to be a man. The day you married April, you promised God you would be her husband. When you learned she was pregnant, God gave you responsibility for your child."

"Today you failed them all." John looked down at his hand and the blood that dropped from it. "I guess you got your 'til death do us part' today."

"Congratulations, Eric."

Beth Tucker walked up beside her husband. She took his left hand and laid it in hers. She reached over with her other hand and massaged the wedding band on his finger. She looked him in the eye and led him away.

A while later, Johnston Green found the Tuckers in one of the patient bays. A nurse was packing the puncture would in John's hand. Johnston walked in and stood square to John.

John tried to stand but Johnston pushed him back down and said; "We've been friends a long time…"

"Johnston I am so sorry …" but John was cut off.

"For what… helping my daughter in every way you could? Or telling my son everything I wanted to say? I've no quarrel with you. You should know better. I just wish we all had done more for her when she was here."

John hung his head for a moment. He looked up and said; "Well then I'm sorry for that."

"John. We've been friends a long time. And I know this is a lot to ask." Johnston's voice began to crack.

"Johnston. We're more than friends. We're family. You can ask anything of me."

"I know but… with April gone… We need to bury her..." Johnston started to cry. "…and I've got nothing to offer her and my granddaughter."

"Just tell me what you need and it will be done."

"They deserve a proper burial."

"It will be done. You should plan everything for tomorrow afternoon."

A while later, Johnston Green found the Tuckers in one of the patient bays. A nurse was packing the puncture would in John's hand. Johnston walked in and stood square to John.

John tried to stand but Johnston pushed him back down and said; "We've been friends a long time…"

"Johnston I am so sorry …" but John was cut off.

"For what… helping my daughter in every way you could? Or telling my son everything I wanted to say? I've no quarrel with you. You should know better. I just wish we all had done more for her when she was here."

John hung his head for a moment. He looked up and said; "Well then I'm sorry for that."

"John. We've been friends a long time. And I know this is a lot to ask." Johnston's voice began to crack.

"Johnston. We're more than friends. We're family. You can ask anything of me."

"I know but… with April gone… We need to bury her..." Johnston started to cry. "…and I've got nothing to offer her and my granddaughter."

"Just tell me what you need and it will be done."

"They deserve a proper burial."

"It will be done. You should plan everything for tomorrow afternoon."

That night Saun Lawter and John Tucker left for Rogue River. It was a fast and dirty salvage mission. They never drove straight down the highway but that night they did. Their first stop in Rogue River was a phone booth. They left it with a copy of the yellow pages. Their next seven stops included funeral homes, monument builders and churches. They got back to Jericho just before dawn.

Their work for the day was just starting. Without taking time to sleep, they worked in the maintenance shed to pin the two carts together forming a carriage. They mounted a platform and covered it with black cloth. Then the two of them secured a beautiful cherry coffin atop it. They hooked two matching chestnut stallions to the carriage.

"Saun. Put everyone's clothes in the truck and then drive the carriage to behind the med center. I should be done by the time you get there."

With that, John jumped in the freightliner and drove into town. He went to the med center and asked where April and her child had been put. He was led to a building out back that was vented to the outside. The temperature inside was near freezing.

Since he had no idea how to embalm April he didn't even try. He cut the hospital gown from her body. He took his time and treated her remains with respect. With gentle movements, he straightened her limbs and washed her from head to toe.

"I know your father would be here to do this for you… but he's having a hard time right now. You need to know that he loves you and cares for you because you are his daughter. You're one of his own."

He did the same for her child.

"As for your father… he's just a little lost in the woods, but he should be here for you. Is it OK if I treat you as one of my own?"

After drying both remains, he then dressed April in one of Lora's favorite dresses and swaddled Tracy in a matching shawl. He perfumed their remains and placed the little Tracy in April's arms.

John could feel strong hands on his shoulders. He turned and met Saun's gaze. Seeing the tears in Saun's eyes, he realized he had been crying the whole time. Without saying a word, Saun handed him a large leather and stainless flask. The high proof bourbon burned John's throat. The burn felt good as it cauterized his stomach. "The Greens will appreciate this."

"I hope its what they wanted."

They took the coffin off the carriage and gently laid April and Tracy to rest inside. They had a moment to rest before Lora got there. Both men had gone all night without sleep and it was starting to show. Their eyes were red and somber. Their motions were slow and deliberate.

Lora showed up ten minutes later. She walked in and nodded to the men. She opened her makeup case and went to work. The men got up and went to the Green's house. There they picked up Johnston, Jake, Stanley and Jimmy and drove out to the cemetery.

At the cemetery, the picks and shovels traded back and forth. The flask passed among the men while they rested although none ever took more than a sip. In the hours it took to dig the grave, no one spoke a word. They set the headstone on the grave and left.

When they returned to the Green's home, Gail and Beth met the men with a lunch, but none of them ate. Everyone dressed, greeted their families and walked to the church. The Greens walked with the Greens… the Tuckers with the Tuckers… and so on.

Once at the church a group gathered on the side. The Greens walked up to the group. Beth and Lora met Gail, "Would you like us to take you inside?"

"I'd like to wait for April."

"Then may we wait with you?" Gail nodded her head.

John Tucker walked up to Johnston. "Everything is ready. I'd like to take you to her."

"I'd like that John."

Johnston and Jake started to follow, but Eric held back. John looked to him "Eric, let's go get your wife." With that all three Green men walked with their friends to the back of the Jericho Medical Center.

"Johnston… Eric… here's your girl. I've done everything I could for her. Thank you for trusting me."

"Thank you… you've done more for us today than you know."

They lifted the coffin onto the carriage and formed a procession to the church. Eric and Johnston walked before the carriage, Jake and Stanley beside it. The carriage stopped outside the church doors. There Gail Green laid a large bouquet of white lilies on the coffin from the Tucker's greenhouse.  
Johnston led the service and several people spoke. John Tucker missed all of it. He spent his whole time with his head bowed sitting amongst his family. His left hand was on his wife's thigh. There she massaged the platinum and gold band. His right arm was around Sammy. Every time Sammy squirmed in the pew, it brought a smile to his face.

Throughout the service, John Tucker spoke with God. Every time Sammy squirmed, it was God answering his questions of 'Why?' When his wife massaged his wedding band, it was God reassuring and giving him strength.

After the church service, John asked another man to take his place at the carriage. Johnston and Eric led the procession to April's final resting place.

John threw Sammy on his shoulders and they walked behind the carriage as a family. Beth was on his left holding his hand. Sammy was on his shoulders. Andrew and Emma walked just in front of their parents. The crucifix hung around his neck.

Beth Tucker looked up at him, "The walk will be good for the baby."

John had done a lot of walking in the last twenty-four hours. He walked in the shoes of a good friend and father. Doing so had helped rejuvenate him and his family. He looked at his family. He breathed in the life they gave him and felt the strength settle into his soul.

"This walk will be good for us all."


End file.
